People Say I Make it Look Easy

It is actually not easy at all. While the attitude part, choosing to be persistent and patient, is fairly standard now; it is amazing to me how often I find myself in the company of someone who is “chomping at the bit” to help me. Do I look that needy? Or is it not about me at all?

Being reasonably independent is very important to me. For example, cutting food. I carry a rocker knife in my purse (not on airplanes, of course) so that I can be independent in this area. Sometimes the item being cut is resistant to the blade – or my knife is dull – and it appears to be a difficult. I have had people almost leap over the table to help me! I had one person offer to help because it was taking me so long to cut my pizza that I was slowing down the meal. I was not pleased, but I acquiesced. It may seem unreasonable, or perhaps it is a grieving moment, but I feel like a child when someone offers to cut my food. If I don’t have my knife with me, I ask for my meat to be cut in the kitchen (even though it might alter the presentation) or order something that will not require cutting. If you are having a meal with me, be patient. I really prefer to do it myself!

Another example, trying on clothes and jewelry. When sales associates are too eager to help me, I smile and remind them that I do not have a dressing assistant at my house. Therefore, if I cannot get into and out of a garment independently, it is not coming home with me. I had a humorous experience recently. I was in a store looking at a pair of earrings. Because I no longer wear posts (think about it), I was looking at a pair of hoops. These hoops, however, did not open in the typical manner. The friendly, eager sales associate said, “It will be easier if you use two hands.” I replied, “I would, if I could!” She was mortified and I smiled and assured her that it occurs often and I take it as a compliment that someone does not noticed my one-handedness.

Many everyday things take a little extra time now, but I have learned to allow myself more time, more room for patience and persistence. But trust me, if I need to tie my shoes and you are close by, I will ask for help before you offer it! Promise.

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